I’ve been in a writing mood all day, however, I wasn’t quite sure what to write about. I haven’t really had time to listen to and review a record from beginning to end, due to the fact that I’ve been busy with school and work. Also, I’ve noticed that my personal posts tend to receive a more heavy amount of traffic than my album reviews; so today, I am sharing an update on my personal life.
As I mentioned last week, I just wrapped up my 21st year of life and am now feeling 22. So far, I have no complaints. I celebrated my birthday with my closest friends and family, and was reminded of how loved I am.
I recently withdrew from my quantitative methods class, and I felt like shit for doing so. Unfortunately, I have so much going on this semester, and going to that class just wore me out everyday. If I’m not interning this summer, my plan is to retake the class. Otherwise, I will retake it in the fall, giving me an 18 credit hour schedule. I realize taking 18 hours in my final semester isn’t ideal, but it also isn’t impossible.
It has been almost three months since Jay* broke up with me, and as much as I feel that I am over it, I still have so many more questions. As fucked up as it sounds, I sometimes wish he would’ve just cheated on me, that way I would stop dwelling on “what would’ve happened had I done this differently?” or “what if I hadn’t done or said that?” I have come to realize that distance, albeit doable, poses more cons than pros. I can’t hate the guy for breaking my heart, as breaking up with me was the more logical thing to do in this situation.
Going through a break up is a lot like going through a drug withdrawal. Some days, I feel great without it, and some days I want to reach out and tell him how much I miss everything. I find that I have to remind myself that if I do reach out, nothing good will come out of it.
I have tried going on dates with other people, but at this point in my college career, there’s pretty much no point in attempting to build a new long-term relationship with anyone, as I am almost done, and ready to begin a new chapter elsewhere.
Midterms are drawing nigh, and between school, interning, working and SI-ing, I am busier than ever. However, after midterms comes spring break, and for once, I have big plans.
I will be going to Los Angeles to visit a few friends, potentially line up a summer internship and a post-grad job, and to just explore the city. Also, this spring break will mark a year since Jay* and I had begun dating, and I think being as far away as possible from where I was at this time last year will do me plenty good.
My to-do list for LA is extensive, to say the least.
I realize that I probably will not be able to touch on all of the items, as I wasn’t able to do everything I wanted to do during my week in New York, however, I plan on trying to do as much as I can throughout the course of the break.
Despite hitting a few bumps in the road, I can honestly say that I am very happy with my life at this point. I feel like I have my goals set, and I am ready to go after them. I am not sure what God has in store for me, but I am very excited to see what’s going to happen next.
Note: *indicates a name-change to protect identity